04. To Everything There is a Season

January 2009.

This winter seems unending, like time has moved much slower in my little world. The cold dreary grey days slip into cold dreary dark nights and my mind and my body seem less motivated to rise above the valley cloud that can plague the city. My new years resolution to eat healthier, live healthier is but a vague memory. Thoughts of spring and summer are few and far between for me. It's like a long distance lover, too far off to think about their charms, because it just makes you miss them more. I have drudgingly muddled through much of the season waiting for time to pass. Wish it would just hurry up and spring would arrive already!


Today, my heart is aching for a good friend of mine. After my friend noticed rapid changes in her mom's memory and demeanour a few weeks ago, she has been going non-stop in the merry-go-round of medical appointments and tests to uncover what is happening. And now she knows. Her mom's rapid Alzheimer’s is because of an inoperable brain tumour. Her mom has been given a few weeks to live and is now in hospital awaiting a room in hospice to help her transition through this final stage of her life. Time is not moving slowly for my friend and her big wonderful family. It is passing at light speed and I know they are holding on for dear life, trying to keep focused and create memories and share with each other before her time has passed. We all have, or certainly all will, go through this angst filled sad journey of losing someone we love and care dearly for . So when a friend is going through this, your heart aches for them, and your thoughts and prayers become focused. Time is moving way to fast for my friend right now. If I could, I would stop the clock, reverse it and run through this long cold drawn out winter all over again. Her family needs time.

There in lies my epiphany. I can't speed up or stop time. The nature of the seasons, is inert and apparent in every aspect of life. The winter is not long or short, it just is. And without it's sensations of dormancy, reflection, quiet solitude or completion , you couldn't pass through to life's next season.

I have in my keepsakes a letter that was written to me by my former manager and mentor as I was leaving my job some eight years ago. He began with the quote "to everything there is a season" from the Byrd's 1965 hit song. He went on to write a beautiful letter that to this day makes me feel proud of my time and accomplishments in my broadcasting career. That quote, that letter, that song popped back into my mind today. I have no doubt, the warmth of the sun and clear blue skies will return too.